The Unemployed Fish out of the freshwater of well-placed friends

Now this can be one serious decoy in your path to a glorious destiny.

For now, celebrate for your pals, coz they deserve it. Thankfully they won't be the jealous backbitching not-so-well-placed ones, when you land on your big dream cloud.

It immediately follows that even you are expected to be cool about it. Just that, don't give up on yourself yet. Just because your bestie (who you think you share all your traits with) has landed herself an opportunity that seems like the best possible (for now at least) doesn't mean that your world will come crashing down, imagining how you could be discriminated against!

It's ok to feel let down, but not cool to dwell on it.

Ok, so you just heard the news!
Pause-> Grieve->
What you do next decides a very crucial thing. Your EQ or Emotional Quotient.
-> Dwell on it and slop till you drop:
Or,
-> Cool, I now have another reason to work some more on myself. What next, folks?
While nothing productive comes out of the former, except some mean waste of time, the latter is one cool attire that your persona will always look fashionable in.

The whole world goes around hope. And with every rejection you'll realize that you're only being redirected to something that was always meant to be for you. So is this temporary setback worth all your precious time?

Enough of self pity. Now pull back your hair, blurt out some done-to-death self-help stuff on a blogspot (wait, is that? Yes, yes, guilty as charged), put on some music, lipstick, whatever makes you feel better and don't forget to don that confident smile of yours.

You're the best and noone but you know that best.
Go grab the next!
(or the one after a few. Patience!)

Wolves in my dream: Have I spent too much time being a loner?

"I see people around me running for cover, trying to shield themselves from some kind of apocalyptic disaster. There's a siren, a loud warning of some sort. Suddenly a shriek of silence pierces the chaos and I'm the only one standing in a desert of mountains.

And then I saw them. Wolves, a whole pack of dismal grey shadows.

Coming out slowly, one by one, sniffing in the aroma of the lone ranger...revelling in their prospective victim's fear.

Before I could twitch my muscles, before my reflexes could take over, realization hit me. I was about to be chased by a dozen hunger-thirsty wolves.

And with one long blood-curling howl began the hunt!"

I blink twice or maybe several times, inhale deeply. The wolves had long disappeared, so had the mountain terraces where from they had landed on their fours. There was no longer any daylight and it was pitch dark.

I wake up, sweaty and panting. The skin on my back felt like something had been hitting it repeatedly, somewhat like the snouts of those racing wolves, missed hits, missed chances.

So, why did I dream about wolves in the first place?

Dreams are a conscious manifestation of our subconscious, when we are least touched by worldly worries, in our sleep.

It's not like I've ever, even in my lost-in-thought-phases, pondered about anything remotely linked to these wild hounds. So why them, of all the animals that I actually find adorable or intimidating?

A few hours on Google helped me translate my dream into terms of reality.

Being chased by wolves means I've been trying to run away from a sticky situation and from any social obligation.

I've always been a loner, but have I taken it a bit too far this time? Enough to stick out its ugly head during my finite moments of death (read sleep)?

Maybe we should all risk letting ourselves out, sharing our dormant struggles once in a while...risk being vulnerable. Maybe we'll find solace in adoring company, maybe we'll grow stronger in the face of adversity. Maybe we should leave it to "maybe" sometimes and let her weave her magic of hope...guess it's way better than shutting ourselves out and trying to play comfortably numb.

If only...

Can't believe I'm writing my first blog!

Well, here I am. A complete non-writer with no trace of creativity in my blood, writing a blog! I mean, how dare I? How dare I torture those who'll be going though my posts in a few minutes time? That is if anyone goes through my posts at all :P.

All this mayhem started when my part II exams ended. That day I went to hang out with my school buddies, Aritri and Ipshita. While we were discussing about the uncertainty of our future, Ipshita announced that she'd been hired by PWC to intern for a month and it suddenly hit me, it's time to wake up. The following few days went in a blur with me slogging to build a proper resumé, getting recommendations and going about asking people about internships. But it seemed that CU students weren't actually keen on any sort of first-hand experience in the job market, especially in the final year of their college. They chose to focus more on the various entrance exams on a national level, that they'd appear in, the following year. One of my seniors actually advised me to forget about internships and concentrate on studies. And my burning desire to get hired by some company started mellowing down. The pressure started building up when the 3rd year tuitions began and I started realising that the internships are not for me. But I needed to earn my own discretionary spending money. And how? Providing tuitions to children? Too exhausting, though easiest and safest! In America, you can wait, cook and clean, deliver newspaper and stuffs and yet not be looked down upon. In India if you even dream of doing the same, you stand the chance of being disowned by your family! So what are the options left? Pretty much nothing, because anything apart from providing tuitions will demand more time and time is something that I can't compromise on under any circumstances, right now. Well, I'm still jotting down possible stuffs that might help me earn a few bucks and enrich my resumé simultaneously. Wish me luck with that.

And while I'm starting to figure out the various hard ways of life as one grows up, I'll write this blog, asking for your advice, sharing my joys, sorrows, fears etc. with you, my fellow readers (hello, is anybody out there? :D) and of course tormenting you with my silly thoughts. I'm not a gifted writer, so don't expect heavy words or poetry from me. I'm just an ordinary girl going extraordinary with all my newly learned life skills *winks*